2013: What I've Gained and What I've Lost

Facebook can give you your year in review with the highlights from the things you posted. A have to tell you, mine kinda sucked. Because I don't put every success and failure on my status updates (trust me, I would be unfriended with all the whining), there wasn't much to show for this year. In an effort to be a little more grateful for what I have, I've decided that the best way to do my year in review on this blog is to break it down in terms of what I have gained over the past twelve months and what I have lost.

What I've Lost in 2013
*The will to work for pennies. Clients looking for a masterpiece written for just $5 will have to find another sucker.

*Inhibitions about sharing my writing with people I know. While I've always been glad to share my work with strangers, it's another thing to be vulnerable enough to hand it over to friends. Family--I'm still working on the courage to get to that point.

*The idea that dreams fade. These dreams I keep in my pocket aren't fading away--they are just evolving to fit into my life the way it is rather than the way I want it to be.

*10 pounds. Hey, losing isn't always a bad thing. ;-)

What I've Gained in 2013
*Perspective on my career. I can't possibly keep my head down and quiet, yet still find success.

*The will to try. Convincing me to do something out of the ordinary isn't my strongest suit. But I've definitely been trying to try more often.

*Knowledge that freelancing is not as easy as it used to be. I don't think that it was ever easy, but it has been more lucrative in the past. If I have to bow out to concentrate on my writing career, I'm okay with that.

*The vision to see that nothing is impossible--I just haven't found the right path yet.

After the year in review, the next logical step is to talk about all the New Year's resolutions I want to make. Most resolutions are pointless because by Valentine's Day you have given up, and who needs the double disappointment of eating chocolate alone in your room and knowing that you have failed? Okay, so I'm assuming everyone spends that holiday celebrating the same way I do... Anyway, resolutions are not for me. I'm going to set some personal and professionals goals, but they are scaled to my current situation and completely attainable as long as I put in the work. Now if I could just get someone to pay me a salary for being my fabulous self, I would be all set for 2014. ;-)

Challenges and Goals, NOT Resolutions

I don't do resolutions, but I do often try to create goals and challenges for myself that are attainable throughout the year, if even I slip every once in awhile. The big goal is still the same -- working and living in New York. But the smaller goal that goes along with the traveling theme is to get to D.C. in April for the cherry blossoms. That's been on my to-do list for the past three years or so. The shorter trip is much more attainable and will give me more travel experience, even on my pitiful earnings.

I have also challenged myself to do what I do best. I am currently challenging my self to take one photo each day, write one haiku each day and write a full poem (non-haiku) each day. The poem challenge might change to revising a poem each day once I run out of ideas, but its simple a way to keep me motivated. And if I'm in a hurry, these things can be completed in less than an hour at any place I may be. In fact, it may get me away from my computer more often, which I see as a plus.

So far, I'm ahead of the game on everything but the photos, because its seems like its cheating to take more than one photo per day that counts toward this goal. However, poetry is different. I'm two days ahead on the poems and the haiku simply because I have so many ideas I'm trying to frantically get out. Even notes aren't enough -- if too much time passes I usually can't read my handwriting.

Are you challenging yourself to do anything this year?

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I went with a friend to see Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story last night. Let me just say first that I haven't been to a movie theater in almost three years, so that automatically gives the experience much more to me than it does to everyone else... but, the movie was amazing! Funniest things I've seen all year (all year? ha ha). Though my friend wasn't ready for the breif male nudity we both had a great time. The Apatow Group, apparently as it's known now, turns out great movies. I'll admit I probably haven't seen more than two of them, but the ones I did see deserve praise.

I downloaded two new podcasts last night. I think that brings my total podcast count up to nine podecsts, with 169 episodes unseen, and about 61 new ones downloading. I think I've gone a little podcast crazy. BUT, as I said before my "cable" company screwed me out of CNN, so a podcast is the only way I can watch AC 360. I also like to sleep in now so it is vital that I get the Today Show podcast. The Nightly News podcast I could do without just because I catch it on TV most nights, but sometimes the "cable" searches for its satellite signal and I can't get the station it's on.

But the new ones: VintageToons and Scrubs. Now I'm a little upset: Scrubs isn't downloading. There's a problem. But once I get it, I'll be happy. And you know how much I love to rant and rave about old cartoons being morally high and mighty while still retaining racist and ethnic stereotypes. Ah, the good old days.

I promise my blogs won't always be this boring. I'm just getting a slow start on 2008 and haven't prepared myself enough to blog daily, like I'm trying. And no--it's not a resolution to blog daily. It's a goal. There's a difference.

How did you celebrate your New Year's Eve? I rang in the New Year in front of the TV set in the living room, watching the 20 minute New Year's Eve with Carson Daly. I would have preferred to watch CNN's New Year (do I have to keep capitalizing it? Hmmm..) celebrations, but the "cable" company pulled CNN from my lineup two weeks ago. at least I still have my podcasts.

I'll admit it though--at 12:00:15, I cried a little. I do every year. I still haven't figured out what I cry for though: am I crying because 2007 is gone or because 2008 is here?

I didn't make any resolutions this year. There's no point. Like 99% of those who do, I don't keep them. I'm lucky to stick to whatever I promised myself I would do after the first week when it's time to go back to school and get caught up. Only difference this year is that I'm not going back to school. I'm hitting the pavement and getting a job... well, maybe the cyber pavement, but it's still hard work. I don't have a comfortable computer chair.